Day 21: Got Manners?!

Asalaamu Alaaikum

Do you know what the strangest (worst) combination is? A person who practices the Deen but has an awful character and/or bad manners. It just doesn’t make sense right? After all, good character and manners make up such a great portion of the Deen. You would think it would be a rarity to see a bad mannered Muslim with bad aakhlaq, sadly it is quite the opposite. More and more we see Muslims who don the right clothing, read the right kitaabs (books) and quote every hadith and ayah yet they constantly harm Muslims with their tongue. In fact, there are even leaders in the sphere of Dawah who exemplify the worst of character traits. These people have narcissistic tendencies, inflated egos and very loose tongues that inflict harm on Muslims, young and old alike. I will not name and shame, as this is not the point of my post. My goal is just to increase our awareness about the importance of manners and good character in our religion. Reflect on the following hadith:

Abu Darda reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Nothing is heavier upon the scale of the believer on the Day of Resurrection than his good character. Verily, Allah hates the shameless, obscene person.

Abu Sirmah reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Whoever harms others, then Allah will harm him. Whoever is harsh with others, then Allah will be harsh with him.”

Source: Sunan al-Tirmidhī 1940

Source: Sunan al-Tirmidhī 2002

Bullying, intimidation, harshness, rigidness, lack of compassion and mercy all go against the principles of our religion. If we have any character or personality trait or a frequent habit we engage in which opposes our Deen, we only have one option: to drop it! So for example, if we tend to have no filter when we speak, and thus say inappropriate comments or nitpick at peoples’ faults, this is something we need to rid ourselves of before it destroys us. Before we have to pay for it in this world and possibly the next. A famous, well-quoted hadith which is sadly overlooked in terms of implementation, details what will happen to a person who harmed Muslims with their tongue and hands on the Day of Judgement. One such unfortunate person will have all of their good deeds taken away by those they harmed and when their good deeds run out, they will be left with the sins of others! Imagine! A whole life of ibaadah and good deeds converted to sins! All because of the evil they created on earth with their tongue and limbs. I know we do not desire such an unfortunate end. This is a reminder to myself first that we should take great effort in refining our manners, controlling our tongues, perfecting our speech and getting rid of bad habits and traits which negatively impact those around us. For all the knowledge in the world will not benefit us, if that knowledge is not displayed in our manners and character. May Allaah grant us good akhlaaq and adaab! Ameen

Stay tuned for more reflections!

Wasalaamu Alaiakum

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